Big Spender Watch: Detroit Pistons

Could this guy get any classier? NO.

These days it seems a tad ironic to call anything in Detroit “flush,” but that is just what the Detroit Pistons are with over $20 million in cap space coming into the off-season in the increasingly competitive Eastern Conference (is there any disparity left between East and West??). What seemed like a bust a year ago–unloading Chauncy Billups for team destroyer Iverson, a playing time fiasco, a first year coach who couldn’t control his squad, a playoff humiliation–now looks like a really good chance to reload. In addition to Iverson, it also looks like Rasheed Wallace and Antonio McDyess are going to be gone. Needless to say, the Detroit Pistons are going to look at whole lot different next year.

Don't worry guys! Just a one year thing!

The Pistons now have two options on how to spend this $$$, which I call the Make It Rain and the Ordell Robbie option.

1) The Make It Rain option:

If you got it, spend it early and often. Life is about living in the moment!

This option would have the Pistons dropping that $20 million this year, getting locked into some long term contracts. That means you go for the goods now. With Hedo Turkoglu, Carlos Boozer, Charlie Villanueva, Ben Gordon, and David Lee on the market (wait, how did David Lee get in there?), who gives the Pistons the best chance at competing in the East Conference next year?

Assuming Iverson, Wallace, and McDyess are gone, the present starting squad looks like this:

C Jason Maxiell
F Kwame Brown
F Tayshaun Prince
G Rip “The Mask” Hamilton
G Rodney Stuckey

Of the remaining, only Walter Herrmann (?), Arron Afflalo, Will Bynum, and Chase Budinger seem like they could even get on the floor. This means you are really lacking in front line power. This also means that, if you address your most pressing needs, you just have to accept Rodney Stucky as the starting point guard. He was, by no means, a bad player last year, with 13.4pts 3.5r 4.9a averages.

So, who would you take? Ben Gordon doesn’t really satisfy any pressing need. Boozer would have been great, but he isn’t going to opt out of the last year of his Jazz deal. Hedo would be a good fit and Villanueva, who improves every year, could fill a major need. David Lee scores a lot but was that a product of the NYK offense? Yet, although all of these players would fill a need and make them competitive, will any of them allow the Pistons to seriously compete in the stacked East with the Shaqified Cavs, the (if healthy) dominant Celtics, or the (hopefully shitty) Magic?

2) The Ordell Robbie option:

"Damn girl, you gettin' high already? It's only 2 o'clock in the afternoon. I get my shit done for the day, then I get high."

This option, named after Samuel L. Jackson’s immensely enjoyable character in Jackie Brown, would be to wait until 2010 when everyone who is anyone (LeBron, Dwyane, Chris Bosh, et cetera) will be on the market. See, Ordell doesn’t get high just because he can, he gets his shit done before he enjoys himself. The man has a Quaker level of self-denial. This would mean not going after easy fills just because you can. It may seem sweet to have a competitive team next year, but how will it feel when they get waxed again in the first round?

"AK-47. The very best there is. When you absolutely, positively got to kill every motherfucker in the room, accept no substitutes."

If you wait til next year, you have the chance to get an AK-47 type of player. Someone who can immediately make you top flight again in the East. Yet, this is tricky since you put all your marbles in one basket, when most of these players will be looking to play in big markets where their star image can reign supreme.

Answer? I think you have to go a little Make It Rain and then gamble on the Ordell Robbie option working in 2010. Thus, you pick up one medium-big name player this year but don’t tie up all your money just in case you can reel in someone like Bosh (who will think Detriot is a huge market compared to Toronto). Yet, this is all a gamble. I think, in reality, that there are no quick fixes for this team and one or two years of good acquisitions may not do it. But, I dare to dream.

Also, big up to Joe Dumars. Who doesn’t love Joe Dumars?

Whitewash: The Indiana Pacers

Yesterday, on his national radio program, Dan Patrick was talking NBA with former Pacers great Reggie Miller. After discussing the many moves made by the top three in the Eastern Conference (all making the East perhaps more intriguing than the West next season) Patrick turned to the recent draft to ask Miller who he thought would make the most immediate impact. Both agreed that Spain’s young phenom, Ricky Rubio, was as much hype as talent, and then Patrick understandably sought Miller’s opinion on the Pacers first round pick, Tyler Hansbrough. Miller, whether simply supporting his team or not, argued that Psycho T would be a very “serviceable” player who would play 8-10 years in the league. He also bet Patrick dinner that the forward would be a 1st or 2nd team all-NBA rookie. Patrick was highly skeptical and said that he would take the likes of Brian Scalabrine over Hansbrough any day of the week and that Hansbrough would be of little impact in the league. (Nostrapossumus is on the record with Reggie, as you will recall– I predicted a Laettner-esque career for the T.)

Dan Patrick sometimes makes himself go, "Hmmm..."

Patrick then laughed and called the Pacers the “whitest team in the NBA.” Reggie rightfully questioned what exactly Patrick meant to indicate with this comment, but the implication was clear: teams with so many white players as the Pacers are an anomaly, and frankly, not that good. This got me to thinking about the veracity of such an assumption. Is race somehow indicative of talent and success in the NBA?

Of course, this is tricky territory. One should not try to essentialize race in any form, much less based upon a small sample of athletes. However, was Patrick’s comment a mere observation, a reenforcement of a race-based assumption of athleticism in African Americans and/or the lack thereof in white men, or a reflection of the fact that the most dominant NBA players in the last couple decades have been African American?

First, it is true that the Pacers have a number of contributing white guys. The roster for next season will likely feature Mike Dunleavy, Travis Diener, Jeff Foster, Josh McRoberts, Troy Murphy, Rasho Nesterovic and Tyler Hansbrough. But what can we determine from this roster? Was the Pacers lack of success last season somehow linked to the whiteness of the team or due to many other factors?

Pacers forwards Mike Dunleavy and Troy Murphy laugh on the Pacers bench.

I am not sure I have an answer to this question, but I do think it is true that the NBA has perhaps the smallest percentage of high profile whiteness of any of the big three American sports (basketball, baseball, football). Steve Nash is a two-time MVP, and certainly, players like Bird and Stockton defined their positions. However, if one were to poll 100 Americans on who the best 20 players in the NBA are, I suspect that Nash would be pretty exceptional rather than part of a large group of white dudes named.

Perhaps it has more to do with what have become “traditional roles” in the league. Successful white players tend to be marked as “fundamentally sound,” “finesse” guys– shooting big men, three-point shooting guards. These positions imply a high level of specialization and generally connote a lack of toughness or “pure athleticism.” White guys are often “role players.” But then again, this can be said of a number of African American players, too. Dennis Scott and Nick Anderson were certainly specialized, “finesse” players, e.g.

Maybe, cultural differences have helped define the trend. It has been well documented that relatively few African Americans are playing baseball these days, and that basketball is by far the most popular sport in Af-Am communities. (Expense is one factor cited, because baseball is relatively expensive.) Therefore, one could easily argue that among American-born players, white guys make more of an impact in MLB than African Americans.

So what is all of this to say? I dunno, really. I just thought it was an interesting comment from Patrick, and one whose intent might be questioned.

Homework Assignment

For all you folks who missed this when Seamus and I screened it, here is a link to Rob Perri’s majestic I’m Keith Hernandez. Warning to those in submarines: your head will definitely explode if you mix this film with the high pressures of being underwater. Please do not watch until you reach the surface.

Confederations Cup: Q&A with Tony Meola

Former U.S. Team keeper Tony Meola stopped by TDGP Studios today to answer a few questions about Team USA’s surprising performance in the Confederations Cup, in which they lost in “heartbreaking” 3-2 fashion to Brazil.

Listed below are excerpts of Meola’s conversation with Travis:

Q: Was anyone surprised that the U.S. dropped three goals to Brazil during the second half in yesterday’s Confederations Cup final?
A: No one who I spoke with.
Q: Was Stan Van Gundy coaching the U.S. team yesterday?
A: No, they just choked in a way that made it seem like Van Gundy might have been coaching them.
Q: Who’s your favorite player on the team?
A: Jozy Altidore?

Q: Why?
A: I think his name is cool.
Q: Is Clint Dempsey actually a legitimate world class player who might help the team do well in next year’s World Cup?
A: Maybe.
Q: What does Clint Dempsey do when not showing signs of promise on the field?
A: He concocts bad hip hop for Nike under the name “Deuce.”

Q: Is Clint Dempsey a douchebag?
A: I haven’t met him, but all signs indicate that he is.
Q: What would give the U.S. the greatest chance to do well in the World Cup next year?
A: Colonizing Brazil.
Q: Does not believing in the U.S. Soccer team mean that you hate America?
A: More or less.
Q: How about freedom?
A: Aren’t they the same thing?

Q: Does the fact that the U.S. team now has more players playing in international leagues than ever before have anything to do with their seeming improvement?
A: Yep.
Q: Does the Confederations Cup mean anything?
A: Nope.
Q: Do you know Ground Possum’s real name?
A: Ground Possum. Duh.
Q: Do you still rock the top-tail?
A: Like everyday.
Q: Could we get sued for this?
A: Fuck no. I love you guys. I’m from Jersey, bro. Big Dwight fan.

Yaozers.

Try, try as they might, the Rocket(s) just wouldn't take off.

Seems like it might be time to call it a wrap on this team. To blow up or not to blow up, that is the question.

The Poster Gets a New Host?

Doc Hollywood has informed the Possum that our venerable site may move to a new host to accommodate our massive audience and whatnot.  The move will be accompanied by a new format to make the site even more awesome (if that is, indeed, possible).  We can have separate modules that better archive our posts and categorize content for readers.

Above: TDGP's move to capitalize on merchandizing sends them to Jo-Ann Fabric. The "Old Dudes" Ts have not yet met sales expectations. From left to right: Doc, Seamus, Travis and Rawley.

So, to get ready for the move, I think we should start to get some of those categories ready.  I will, therefore, suggest some here so that we all can consider them (and more from you).  These are the categories I see:

–”Nostrapossumus Predicts”

–”Rants and Raves” (For waylaying, ala “I hate X” and for praising, as in “I love Shaq; good Lord, do I love Shaq.”)

–”Buy the Numbers” (for all those posts that just present the stats)

–”Doc’s Pics and Clips” (for all the posts that basically just consist of stuff that Doc Hollywood finds and thinks are funny)

–”The Lighter Side” (for he fake news and/or purely humorous)

–”Book ‘Em, Travis” (For Travis’ endless stream of quasi-academic and other published source materials)

Not sure what categories fit people like Seamus and Rawley, who publish so rarely, but we can figure that out… suggestions?

Van Gundy Sighting?

Stumbled across this wilst walking the streets of Hanover, New Hampshire:

Van Gundy peddles his wares amongst the relative anonymity of over-educated New Englanders.

Following the well documented debacle that was the NBA Finals, it would appear that TDGP’s favorite punching bag has taken to the road.  While I cannot speak personally to the magic show, I’m confident he will bring his famous “Vanishing Championship” trick to New Hampshire’s Upper Valley.

Superstars: When Divas Collide

Modesty personified.

I’m sure many of you have already seen this. But, I’m reposting this for posterity’s sake. How many people in the world can make T.O. look like the good guy? Answer? One. Self-styled “Sexist Top Model in the World,” Joanna Krupa appears to really lay in to T.O. for no reason on this nonsensical reality show that pairs John Saunders with retired athletes and a couple supermodels as they compete for something, I don’t know, maybe a donut or a bag of shit.

Sure, as arguments go, there is always more than meets the eye (except in that fucking awful Transformers 2: the Rise of Anti-Pleasure) as reported by Michael Silver. I am sure that Terrel Owens is as equally heinous as Warren Sapp, a participant on the show, makes Krupa out to be:

“She’s a maneater,” Sapp said of Krupa. “You heard of cougars and all that (expletive). This is a maneater, buddy. She wants to make it seem like he was (a prima donna), but I was there, and that’s a lie. She’s a nightmare. She treated him like he was her child. She’s crazier than any athlete I’ve ever seen.”

Sadly, T.O. and Krupa were eliminated in the first episode. BUT GUESS WHAT? Jennifer Capriati, no stranger to the tantrum, has a shoulder injury and her team has to leave the show. Thus, reenter T.O. and Krupa!

Who knew TV could be so dramatic? Well, it is when it is staged. If J Cap has a real should injury then I am 50 feet tall. Next thing you know, someone will tell me this is real.

Remember the old days when things weren’t staged in our ol’ mediasphere? Oh wait, hang on.

Yes, undercover cop Jeff Kent is on the show too.

Nostrapossumus on the NBA Draft/Trades

Nostrapossumus has read Doc Hollywood’s take on the draft and NBA trades, and will now give the real analysis of said.

First, as to the draft:

1) Blake Griffin will perform well in LA, but it will not matter.  Griffin is a physical specimen, and because of the relative lack of talent in the Clippers camp, he will, at least once he develops some sort of jump shot, do well in La-La land.  However, as we saw when the Clip got Elton Brand a few years ago, they may be able to approach or even slightly eclipse .500 bball, but they cannot really compete in the West.  As such, Griff will not be a bust like Olowokandi, but he will toil in obscurity for a few until he gets out of his rookie deal and signs with a better team.

2) Steph Curry will make an immediate impact.  As it stands, he is with Golden State, a system built for run and gun scoring by the boatload.  Put him and Ellis in the backcourt, and man, do you have some scoring-in-bunches potential.  However, it appears a deal is in the works to send Curry, Andris Biedrins, Brandan Wright and/or  Marco Belinelli to Phoenix for Amare Stoudemire.

The priciples in the proposed trade.

While the potential trade marks a rebuilding mode for the Suns and a grab at a marquee player for the Warriors, it also makes the Suns look more like the team they were a few years ago.  Getting a slew of players who have played in the run-and-shoot offense of the Warriors makes a lot of sense.  Nash still has a couple years left, and Biedrins and Wright are perfect big(ish) men for an up-an-down style of play.  And, to get back to my point, if the Suns can get back to what made them a super-exciting team to watch (and a BS call away from taking out the Lakers a few years ago) Steph Curry will play LARGE in that system.  Granted, it may all depend on finding a coach like Dantoni to get that offense back in action, but it doesn’t look like Kerr is building a half-court offense, so let’s all cross our fingers.

3) The Spurs will rise again (again).  Doc Hollywood was right that the Spurs got a steal in Blair, as any low post player that can offer a few bench minutes will do well in the Spurs’ system.  Also, they made a great trade to send away expiring contracts and old players Bruce Bowens and Kurt Thomas to get the still potent Richard Jefferson.  Mark my words: if Parker, Ginobili and Duncan stay healthy enough, this team will be a force in the West.  They have one more of those down-a-couple-years, back-to-win-a-ring runs in them, and this year will be it, barring injuries.

Now to the trades alone:

1) The Shaqtus in going about as far away from the Phoenix lifestyle as he can be by getting traded to the Cavs.  But this trade, to me, is being read wrong by the press, who argue that this is a way to try to off-set Howard in Orlando.  First, I guess it is true that the Cavs could not stop Dwight.  However, I am not sure that that was not as much coaching as anything else.  I mean, we all saw Dwight struggle in the Lakers series, simply because of the genius new-fangled strategy of the double-team; let’s face it: Howard’s low-post game is pretty laughable.  Shaq is still a decent defender, I guess, and he will body up Howard.  But, his value is not so much in that as offering what Howard and Cavs center Ilgauskus do not– great passing from the post and a brute force down low.  Also, with Bron’s driving skills, all Shaq has to do is get low and wait for a TON of oop dunks.  The Cavs were really close last year, and if the Magic let the Armenian wonder, Hedo Turkoglu, go, the Cavs one achilles heal, the high pick and roll with two big men, will be history, and the Cavs will have Shaq, besides.  Get ready, Mike Freeman.  Looks like the Cavs may get to the Finals for you next year.

2)  As to the Magic, I, like Doc, am somewhat perplexed by the trade for Vinsanity.  Yes, he is a great scorer and can be a guy to get his own shot when Stan Van has JJ Redick and some other cast-off on the floor for 20-minute stretches, but wouldn’t it have made sense to put Hedo in the deal rather than all your point guard talent?  By getting rid of Rafer (which I don’t mind THAT much) and Courtney Lee, the Magic is thin at the one position where they have shown to be vulnerable– at PG.  Now, they definitely need to get another guard to back up Jameer Nelson; but, if they can do that, I am more optimistic than Doc.

Man, I can't wait to see this happen all over Varejao.

Nostrapossumus sees a hazy cloud around this team, but will hedge his bets and say this: with a PG pick-up,  and b/c the Magic play in the East, they can still easily be the #2 team there.  And, if Ewing can DO SOMETHING and teach Howard just one post move, there is something to be said for a Howard-Vince-Rashard-Nelson-led team.  These two teams in the East can be really exciting next year.

That’s all for now, but as these draft picks and trades finalize and settle, the picture will become clearer for the Possumus.  Stay tuned.

Also:

Where were all the NBA Draft day disaster outfits? Do they all have fashion consultants now? Shame, shame.

Defining an era.

Actually, the more I look at this, the more I dig it.